“One must have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star.”
-Friedrich Nietzsche
There is a powerful truth in these words of German philosopher, Friedrich Nietzsche, as chaos and creativity seem to go hand in hand. A dysfunctional necessity that can give birth to brilliance if even for a moment. Or perhaps it’s just the creator’s illusion of a moment of brilliance.
From somewhere in the depths of my most darkest times, those were the moments I created my best work…my best painting, my best poem, my best story. Frenzied colors on canvas or a successful string of words on paper were produced from the chaos within that I lacked control over. It was within the storm I found the inspiration, the need, the obsession to purge out something beautiful.
That chaos is now calmed by the magic properties found in a diamond blue pill, and that lightening spark of an idea, of instant inspiration to create, has been extinguished. What is left is the lull of a slow tide of ideas that lap up briefly and then withdraw, lacking any passion to pursue any further than the initial thought.
I miss the chaos…at times.
A descent from heightened awareness is a long drop under any circumstances. A descent from creativity is painful regardless of the reason. Sanity, or what is deemed sanity in our world is sometimes a necessary evil. Your post is both beautiful and thought provoking.
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Thank you so much for your encouraging and thoughtful words!
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